In a stark contrast to the brightness of the
dawn, the cloudy thoughts are bleak and cheerless. Listless.
The long list of duties is almost paralyzing. Where should the day even start? How is it possible to prioritize? An underweight, failure to thrive baby who
requires hours and hours to feed. And
still loses weight. A busy preschooler
who needs direction and training and attention.
Without constant supervision, the messes and chaos quickly take over the
house. A sulky teenager, whose
disrespectful words are like arrows piercing the heart, who needs patience and
lovingkindness. And help with a term
paper. An empty refrigerator that needs
to be filled. Loads and loads of dirty
clothes that need to be laundered.
E-mails and phone calls that need responses. Bills that need to be paid. The responsibilities are burdensome,
overwhelming and disheartening. How can
one person possibly accomplish all of this?
The temptation is to retreat, to stay in bed
and hope, somehow, that the children will raise and educate themselves. That the house will clean itself and the
meals will prepare themselves. Of course
that is completely unrealistic. There
really is no other option except to inhale deeply, summon whatever meager
reserve of strength can be found, and face the day.
But surely there is more to life than just
surviving through the endless to-do lists.
Than simply responding to the most pressing, most urgent demands. Than
merely going through the motions with only a sense of duty and obligation. Surely that old refrain, the one in minor key
with the haunting words that get stuck, surely it can be replaced with a hymn
of praise.
Lord, please awaken these lips. Fill them with a new song.
I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to
me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of
the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a
firm place to stand. He put a new song
in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. – Psalm 40:1-3
